Over the years, I have had so many problems with my self confidence. Sometimes, right now in life, I still have some issues with it. The word confidence means the feeling or belief that one can rely on someone or something; firm trust (Oxford Dictionary). My biggest issue is believing that I can achieve this. Yes, I know the biblical scripture that tells me that I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me (Philippians 4:13 KJV). Yes, I know I have to keep speaking positive affirmations over my life. Trust me, I understand all of that. But, (and you knew it was coming) it's an every day battle fighting flesh with the mind.
I journal. I post the sticky notes for reminders. I pray. I read the Word of God. I try things every day to help build up my self confidence. But, it is not easy. I have always struggled with my confidence when someone told me when I was a young adult that I would not be anything and I won't have anything in life. I've gone back to that person to let them know how I felt about it. Never got a complete apology about it because they were trying to brush it off that it was said. It's hard to get pass something like that. Even my husband have told me to let it go. It's just not that simple and easy.
But starting today, I am going to follow these steps to help me build my confidence so that I can no longer doubt myself but believe in myself and go forward.
1) Think Positive.
There is a word that I hate with a passion but it comes up in my life a lot. That word is FEAR! Fear creeps in and takes me to an entire different element in life. I have to stop allowing it to control me and start thinking positive. I have to start thinking about the great things that will come out of the matter.
2) Learn.
I am like a sponge. A sponge sucks up all of the soap and suds. Well, every opportunity is a learning experience. I am always striving to learn something, especially if it is going to make me a better person. I have started reading more to not only learn from it, but occupy my brain for something that can take me far in life.
3) Stop Caring What Others Think
Boy, oh boy, is this hard. A lot of people say that don't care about what others say about you. But you do. I do too. I'm not there to please people but I at least want them to remember something great about me. I used to break my neck (figuratively speaking) to do what others wanted me to do so I could get a great praise from them. When I hear what they say, it gets me angry. I cry. I hurt. I don't want to be bothered. But, I have got to stop thinking about it. If their goal is to tear me down by what they are saying, then I have to make it my goal to build myself up because I'm not stopping to their level. Words can hurt me, but it won't stop me!
4) Change My Company I Keep
I am more focus now on associating myself with people that have, if not the same, but similar life goals as me. Some of the people that I converse with are only there for gossip or to see how they can use me to their benefit. We, as women, already have a "thing" of tearing down other females. I don't need that in my life. I need people in my life that is goal-driven, smart, beneficial to us both, and looking forward to having and living a great life.
5) Taking Care Of Myself
I've read in the past that self confidence comes from within. That means stop focus on the outside and look within yourself. I have to make sure that my mind is thinking positive thoughts at all times. Take time to get a massage. Turn all of my devices off and just enjoy the day. Go for a walk in the park to clear your head. Do things that I like.
I'm going to start with these five (5) tips because I have to start somewhere right. I know some of you that know me will be shocked to read this article because you are probably saying that I have a lot of confidence. But behind the scenes, it's not one of my best areas in life. I know that this is not going to happen over life. But, as I find myself achieving the smalls things that fall into those categories, then I will be very proud of myself.
I. Can. Do. This.
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